Legalize All Forms of Marriage?
Dani Eyer, executive director of the ACLU of Utah, tells The Southern Voice that she answers the question “Will gay marriage lead to legalized group weddings?†with the following response each time it is asked: “The ACLU of Utah has traditionally advocated that personal relationships between consenting adults are protected by the Constitution, and that freedom of religion and freedom of expression are fundamental rights.”
Some, like Harlan White, a heterosexual man who has been in polyamorous relationships with female and male “co-lovers†for many years now, applaud her response.
“I notice when people of one minority group try to relate to the mainstream, there’s an unfortunate tendency to point to another minority group and say, ‘We may be different from the mainstream, but we’re not like them,’†White adds. “… we shouldn’t have to sell ourselves to society by being better than other people.â€
Others, like Mathew Staver, president of the conservative legal group Liberty Counsel, use Eyer’s statement as another reason to oppose gay marriage.
Mathew Staver, president of the conservative legal group Liberty Counsel, agrees that there is “an easy transition†from allowing marriage for gay and lesbian couples to legalized polygamy. But instead of considering them fundamental rights, Staver says neither gay marriage nor polygamy should be recognized by states.
“If you convert marriage to merely the placing of a license on consenting adults that are in a committed relationship, or who love each other, then there is no logical line that can be drawn between gay marriage and polygamy,†Staver says. “Gay marriage clearly opens the door to polygamy.â€
What do you think of Eyer’s response? Would anyone want to see it replaced with a no?
And gay marriage also opens the door to marrying animals and children, too. Or so I’ve been told.
I also think that marriage between consenting adults should be allowed in all forms, possibly (perhaps even probably) including polygamy. That distinguishes it from both children (not adults) and animals (not human). However, the problem with polygamy is the real issue of consent. I don’t have quick access to the studies, but many people have cogently argued that polygamy is not always truly consenual. If we could resolve that problem I, personally, would have no problem with it. Having said that, I wouldn’t practice it either.
There is another counter-argument, of course. People have argued that marriage is defined as between TWO consenting adults (opposite or same sex) and no more. That argument fails, in my estimation, as a means of promoting gay marriage because it relies simply on tradition. Well, tradiiton also says it’s one man and one woman. Tradition alone is insufficient.
OK, straining hard to hold back the wiseass in me, I’ll be serious for a second and say that my belief is that as long as the parties involved consent to the union without coercion and are mature enough to understand the ramifications of their actions, then both the sex of and the number of parties is a moot point. That rules out children and animals and others not competent to make such decisions. (And of course, now we get into the issue of who decides competency or lack of coercion, but that’s for another time.)
You’re right, Jami. That’s what I meant when I said the “real issue of consent”. How do we measure that? Who decides? Polygamy has, arguably, been a device for the further subjugation of women. I don’t want that (well, I don’t want polygamy either). But, logically, I see no reason why the state should interfere with free choice that doesn’t hurt another.
The freedom to make choices [that do not hurt another or impinge on another’s rights] is often times a tricky one because tons of us make choices that hurt ourselves. Are such behaviors and choices really determined by the individual, or are they hugely influenced by society, environment and how one was raised? Since it is often too difficult to determine such influences, freedom of choice remains. Hence, polygamy should be legal in my un-educated law opinion [;)] When’s the next polygamy pride parade? I’m on board [um, well not really]
Choices like killing one’s father after years of abuse are different. The action hurt another individual. I digress. I ramble. I think I need sleep.